Monday, March 30, 2009

cheating....

People cheat when they are unhappy and don't have the voice to say it. That is my assumption on the matter. I am just flabbergasted (word??) at the amount of people that cheat. I am not saying I have been perfect my whole life...I haven't...but I do know that cheating comes from unhappiness...

So is it too much to ask that people start talking again....remember my previous post about my friend who decided to communicate and give her marriage a try...why can't everyone do that? Yes again...I know...but I did try...for me it's not right. This new story I have to share goes a little like this:

So I find out from a friend that I just met in Port Alberni...that his ex is dating a guy here in Courtenay....turns out it's the same guy that is dating my good friend here in Courtenay...small world. So I had the great pleasure this a.m. of informing her that she is not the only one dating said Courtenay guy....you can tell when some one's heart is breaking. Did you know that?? Yup..it's in the eye's. You can see it. Breaking into small little pieces....like I trusted this person and they are doing what?? Then an unfortunate thing happens to some of us women (maybe men don't know) we go into make it better mode....if I just do this....or if I just say that...it will all go back to before my heart broke into 1000 pieces....not so much. So he is now saying they weren't exclusive....well I hate to tell ya buddy I have heard the stories of your non-exclusive relationship with my friend and YOUR EXCLUSIVE DIP SHIT!....you don't do what your doing with more than one person at a time. It's rude, ignorant, insensitive and just plan old stupid! So after I told her and broke her heart....yes nice thing for a best friend to have to do hey....I could see her go into "make it better mode" and I need to stand beside her and remind her (unfortunately from example) that we can never make it better....all we do is make US look like the fools! I say it's time to call the fool the fool and call us the fabulous! I will remind her of this daily until she is thru it. I hate this part of life. But I gotta say...it's reminding me to not be what I don't want to be :)

So talk people....talk to your partners....talk to your family....talk to your friends....get those emotions and concerns out...cause keeping them inside clearly doesn't work....for anyone! Cheaters and Cheatee will be better off talking!!! Trust me!

Well hopefully tomorrow's post will be a happy subject....

Thursday, March 26, 2009

more random...

I just finished having one of the best chat's I have had in awhile! I don't know what it is, age, experience, or just plain old sick and tired of bs...but I am just so open now...and it feels great. Not like I go and tell all the scary details of my life to just anyone....just the one's that will sit and listen for a bit.

So in today's conversation we covered alot! Holly man alive. Don't you just love those ones. We talked about how she is putting her marriage back on track...they have decided to put themselves back on the "to do list" ;) ;) I'm so happy for her. I know I know...but you all know my situation is different...anyhow...I'm so happy because I am finding lately in having open conversations with people that we all just get off track. We get off track with ourselves...we get off track with our partners....then next thing you know we are a train wreck!

In putting myself back on the track lately I can honestly say it feels good. And isn't feeling good the basis for everything. Please show me one person who feels great about themselves that is in an unhappy marriage...really...don't sugar coat....or show me one person who feels like shit about themselves who is in a great marriage...again...no sugar coating....we are all too old for that my friends! ;) So if we put ourselves back on the list we can't help but be doing our relationship a favour right?? Or in my case doing my future relationship a favour. ;)

Getting back on track can be anything...like I was saying to my gf....come on girls...it's spring...put on a cute skirt...some cuter than heck shoes....and go out with a bounce in your step. It feels good...gives you that "feeling" back inside like your a woman! and you matter...and your worth it...and someone just checked me out...omgosh I'm hot! That is what I'm talking about...and how the heck would you not carry that over into your relationship?? If I had someone at home and I came home feeling like that...boy oh boy look out Mr.! :) So give it a go girls! Feel good...feel healthy...feel alive!

I for one know that if I die tomorrow I lived full out today!

Signing off...to go hurl myself down the road...I mean run....then feed the little people....then baseball! Living full out! ;)

Random....

Today feels like a random thought day....not sure if I should take medication for that or not...but whatever! lol

So Danielle is doing this cleanse thing...you know...drink lemon water with some real yummy stuff in it (sarcasm) for 10 days....crap yourself silly....and be cleaned out at the end of it. I often think about doing a cleanse...but you know what I sure like food. Don't get me wrong I'm always watching what I eat and trying to loose weight....but no food for 10 days seems a bit extreme. Her newest addition to her family, Rob, the "husband" is doing it too. I love this guy...not as much as I love Danielle of course....but I love him. He is open with everything...on his facebook status today it says "Robert Rand is on day 5 of the cleanse and day 4 of work... my pooh smells like lemons!"....you gotta love a guy who is happy and excited to share that his pooh smells like lemons! So will I do the cleanse....probably not.....and my excuse will be "it's too hard to not eat when I'm feeding three little people all day long"....that would be like freaking torture no??

What else do I have to share today....hmmmm.....oh right....the running....is going well. I am not sure if it is because I am running (aka hurling oneself down the road) or because I don't seem to eat as much lately...but I'm loosing weight! yeeehaaaa.... Maybe it's just cause I FINALLY feel for once in my life like I am in a good space. You know...happy with myself...enjoying myself....just a good "me" space. So the running...today will be day 5....in a row...I can't remember the last time I did something for 5 days in a row...I'm an instant gratification kinda girl so after 2 days most things are old and I move on.....but I want to try something different...stick to it so to speak. I won't be running tomorrow as it's Friday...and that would be like a sin to run on a drinking day....and I won't run Saturday because I am getting my hair done in the morning and going out of town in the afternoon....sunday...well that will depend on how Saturday night goes....So I will run today...even though I really don't want to....but do I ever??

Tonight is my first ball practice....which means I need to go under the house and find my ball bag....wonder if the cleats are rotten?? blech....so...need to get gear out and go hurl myself around the ball field for an hour or so.....maybe there will be some new cute single guys on the team....doubt it...but hey a girl can only wish! ;)

I'm sure I will be back with more ramblings....not sure if anyone but V or Cindy is paying attention....but hey...better a small audience then none at all right :) Hi girls! :)

Later Gator!

Wednesday, March 25, 2009

Spring!

Is here....look at this beautiful things I got to wear today:


I wore them with a yellow skirt and a white t-shirt....I had an extra bounce in my step that's for sure....and must say...got a few winks ;)

So I ran AGAIN today......I got a bit winded today...not sure if that is because I didn't have the best night's sleep or if it was because I ran a little bit faster than normal....things aren't hurting as bad as the first few days!

Dodgeball tonight.... :) I love being active....and not thinking about my life! lol

cheers

worms....

When it rains in the night the worms are out in the street's the next morning....I wonder to myself....are they running from something....like their little worm holes are flooded...or are they having a party in the streets and someone forgot to set the alarm for them to go home before the sun comes up?? I like to think it's a party....and all the way to the bus we make wise ass cracks about "hey Joe...over here is some good dog poop"...."hey Betty....there's a big pool to swim in over here"....we know how to self entertain! lol...So we walk to the bus...dodging worms...cause it is cruel to step on a hungover worm right?


Now I wanna tell you a bit about Zoe. She is my middle child...and boy oh boy is she a Ham! I love that about Zoe. She doesn't do it in front of many people...I think it's a love/trust thing...but holly crap can this kid crack you up! She is VERY good at doing the Jim Carey funny thing...the faces...the voices....I laugh every time! I know she is going to go into some kind of acting or entertaining....lets just hope it's not...oh never mind....lol.... She's a gas! Yesterday Summer was out playing at a friends and Harley was at his art class so Zoe watched "Journey to the Center of the Earth"...they just got it...it is a 3D version....so I look over and this is my Zoe...what a card:


So of course the flash goes off...but I am so far back it isn't the best picture...me being the scrapbooker beg and plead with her to get a picture of her in her 3D glasses...and this is what she gives me....
Really impressed she was! ROFLOL....love you Zoe!

Well...that's all I got so far...I'm sure I'll come up with something else to talk about later....

Oh and running....I've run for 3 days straight....yesterday got caught in the rain without my rain coat...that was a good time....so of course I was like "if it's raining tomorrow I ain't running" (like I'm talking to someone) and guess what....the SUN IS OUT....shit...guess I'm running....whatever...the scale is going down and my ass has less dimples....so something is working. Yes I said it...my ass has dimples....doesn't everyone's?

Here's to dimple-less by summer! :)

cheers

Tuesday, March 24, 2009

Great Quote

Had to share this one:

"But he that dare not grasp the thorn should never crave the rose." Anne Bronte

The girls from my online scrap group posted it this a.m. for me :)

I crave the rose....and I will have the rose....so a few thorns...ahhh whatever right ;)

blog yah later....

relief....

comes in so many forms....for me last night it was in the form of a conversation....not the conversation itself...but me looking at the conversation afterwards. I realized I was in a situation that wasn't even what I thought it looked like...and it wasn't till after the conversation that it dawned on me "this isn't even what I want!" So today I feel extreme relief....I know I know...we are usually the last to see things on our own journey....but I gotta tell yeah this was a big one. So bit that my urge to help isn't even there....this person has their own journey and they are sooooo far behind where I am I would only be pulling myself backwards! So I saw the light....BAM...right in my eyeballs! :)
so today...hmmm...run again I guess....maybe get crafty...I do have plenty of pictures to catch up on.
a picture for today....this is Becky and her friends in Port Alberni...well they are my new friends too....(becky is the other blonde)....they are a hoot...I haven't laughed so hard in a long time as I do when I am with these girls....they certainly know how to roll with the punches!

Adrianne, Terri, Denise, Me, Becky :) Aren't we a bunch of hotties! ;)

So now that my mellowdrama is complete...what next...oh right...I had put ME on the list....so like I said...running more, scrapping more and on the weekends...more FUN!

Till later...cheers

Monday, March 23, 2009

Well I did it....I bought shoes!


and YES that is them on my feet!! I ran for the second day in a row!! Holly shit hey! I know I know...apparently I turned over a new leaf....for this week anyways! ;) I'm not quite sure if I'm running towards something or away from something...all I know is that it is better than drinking wine everyday....cause that was one of the options! Saving wine consumption for weekends! See smart girl :) Crazy is as crazy does! So back to the running story....ummm...yeah I hurt today...but not as much as I thought I would...just a bit...so I was a good girl and stretched (for the first time ever) before I went out....that made it feel a bit better...and the runner's....uh yah...Heaven on earth running in new runners....silly me not getting new ones like a YEAR AGO! twit....BUT then as soon as I got home...had a hot shower....HOLLY SHIT did the pain ever set in....my legs are yelling at me! I had to go to walmart cause the freaking dogs were out of food...and I must have looked like I had something stuck up my ass walking....stiff legged lady! I even brought Zoe to the store with me for safety reasons....like if I fell over or something she could help me up....or at least do something stupid as to help me not look like such an ass!

So I am finding running is good for my brain...almost as good as drugs (not illegal ones dad...just the kind the dr. gives out ;) ) So anyhow I have been thinking about what I like and don't like alot lately...and I think I'm a snob...of sorts....there is a lot of things people do, say or are that I think is stupid. Take trust for example....WHY ON EARTH WOULD YOU SAY TRUST ME IF YOU DON'T PLAN ON BEING TRUST WORTHY? (yes that is me yellin') I really don't get it....do these people that say "trust me"...really think that we won't notice that they didn't hold up their end of the bargain?? Cause that is what it is right....a bargain...a deal...a promise...a TRUST! So as you can probably tell I'm a little bitter in the trust department....not sure if that will get better or if I will turn into a bitter old wrinkled lady with 30 freaking cats??

Things I do like:

  • my playlist ;) makes me dance in my chair
  • my attitude these days
  • my sensitivity (even though just saying that makes me cry)
  • fruit & nut bars
  • red wine (minimum one bottle at a time)
  • my pathfinder....I think I rock in it! ;)
  • the fact that I can go to Walmart and get called a MILF....if you don't know what that is don't ask you won't want to know ;)
  • my peeps...big & small
  • my can do attitude
  • pogo's...although I can't eat them anymore...damn Gluten :(
  • the summertime....can't wait to get myself a wakeboard this year!
  • my creativity
  • Ucluelet...I love that place...I grew up there and it ROCKS....need to go visit soon!

Well that is enough for right this moment....off to facecrack! lol

cheers

Capricorn

Received this via Kris Norris today....she's a good friend...pushes me to run when I don't want to...I haven't talked to her in a bit...cause I hate running these days...lol...kiddin' Kris...



This is what she sent out:



CAPRICORN - The Passionate LoverLove to bust. Nice. Sassy. Intelligent. Sexy. Grouchy at times and annoying to some. Lazy and love to take it easy. But when they find a job or something they like to do they put their all into it. Proud, understanding and sweet. Irresistible. Loves being in long relationships. Great talker. Always gets what he or she wants. Cool. Loves to win against other signs especially Gemini's in sports. Likes to cook but would rather go out to eat at good restaurants. Extremely fun. Loves to joke. Smart.

You know how most people say "oh this doesn't apply to me" or "I like that part but not this part"...this has got to be the first one I have ever received that I am like "wow...that's me!" lol

So my day today....so so....but the day is young...I may post again later

Sunday, March 22, 2009

and the saga continues.....

This weekend was the first weekend I felt alone. Like that tug at your heart ALONE feeling. I don't wish it upon anyone actually....it's not nice. I know I'm not alone alone in this world...I have my kids (3 of the best I think) and I have fabulous parents....and fabulous friends....but then there is times when you feel alone.

After my recent....thing (as I lovingly refer to it now) I realized I do want to find that special someone. That one! BUT in the meantime...I need to figure out how to be just good with me. Just me in the room....what should I do to self entertain (minds out of gutters at this point please) So today I went for coffee at Lisa's house with Tamara...self invited of course....got a plan going for Friday night....then came home and stared at the walls again.....so did some laundry....stared at facecrack a bit....got lonely again....then decided to go for a run.

I haven't run since before Christmas....for those of you that don't know me that well...I actually hate running most of the time....BUT I do it because it seems to be the only thing that makes any difference in the size of my ass. Well that and biking...but it's too wet for biking and I need to take my bike into the shop because I was a doorknob and left it out all winter...I know I know....hence the doorknob statement. So I ran.....for 1/2 an hour...this may not seem like a lot of time...but when your legs are burning, your knees are telling you were to go...1/2 hour is a long time!! I need new shoes...but you know...single mom...three kids...my runners are the last to be replaced....so I am putting myself back on the list...runner's it is...this week. Maybe that will make me like running...right ;)

The way I see it...from my brain thru to my eyeballs....if I want my Mr.right to find me...I better be at my best! So I run....loose ass....find mr.right....like I said...it's my brain....you don't have to agree...but you have to love me....cause I said so.

I used to have this blog just for my craftiness etc....but I think it's time I start venting....not that anyone cares...but I need to vent....sometimes I will curse....sometimes I will pout...and the occasional crying may happen....so if any of it makes you uncomfortable or you disagree...I don't wanna hear about it. This is my blog. My life. My way! :)

One of the best quotes I think I've ever heard was:

"Don't make someone a priority when they consider you an option"

I love that quote...and I think I need to make a giant size one for my fridge....to remind myself daily....then it will get easier.

Oh and to all you ladies out there....the movie "He's just not that into you"....HIGHLY recommend it. It makes the stalker in you go away quicker and quicker!

OK...off to shower...get the kids back....dinner at parents with brother&family....see not lonely ;)

LOVE YOU ALL! Let the crazy begin :)

Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Living Full Out!

As many of you know I have one of the bestest friends in the world. Danielle St.Jacques Rand. She has helped me thru thick and thin...in good times and in bad. I have no idea where my life would be without her...and I don't ever wanna know. Just like any other friendship sometimes we don't like each other so much...but that never lasts long.

Recently my life has been "adventurous"....to put it nicely...lol.....you know...ups and downs....but Danielle is always standing there with a smile and advice....or no advice when I say "pass". :)

The most recent advice I got I wanted to share with you all cause it is really great. For those of you who know me...I live right out loud....full out! No holds barred. I like that...I like who I am as a person. BUT the downside to living full out is when you come down you usually crash. I'm good at getting back up on my feet...dusting myself off and stepping forward again. In my latest crash I was a bit embarrassed because I had shouted my "news" to the world....Danielle said to me "don't ever be embarrassed for living full out!"

You know what...she's right. I'm not. I live full out. I like it. Either take me or leave me...but that is who I am. I'll love ya...I'll help ya...I'll go to bat for ya...I'm that kinda girl. On the court playing this crazy game of life fully!

Thanks Danielle! :) I'll love you forever and one day!

This is us at Danielle's superfabtabulous wedding!




Thursday, March 5, 2009

Bellarific Friday!

I love Bella stamps....case you didn't know ;) So over at Bella's blog they have a challenge each week for you to follow...Bellarific Friday they call it. This is the first time I have felt inspired to join in....wish me luck! The draw is random....so I don't have to worry about going up against all those talented women! phew!

So here is my entry:


Here's the challenge on their blog if you wanna check it out!

http://stampingbella.com/blog/?p=1211

Blog ya later!

Wednesday, March 4, 2009

Creative day

I had a creative day today and it felt good! I'm not sure if my mojo was flowing because I had an awesome sleep or if I'm just coming out of my slump. Whatever it is "I'll take it!"
First today I created this girly grid for a friend's daughter. She is 7 months old and needs some girly art for her room. I feel so honored that she asked me :) I like this one with the silver hearts...I typically do chipboard covered in more paper but I didn't want it to look too busy and I didn't want to lose the pattern on the paper...so silver hearts it is! :) She really liked it! And boy is Chelsea cute!!
Then tonight I felt like coloring....pulled out this wonderfully cute Bella from my stash of stamped Bella's and colored with my copics. I have been wanting to take a copic coloring class for a long time....yes they have classes to learn how to color with these markers. They are very high end markers. So as I was saying...wanting to take class...going to check on that tomorrow for sure! I made this card for a challenge that Gloria posted with my online scrapbook group. She's the best at having these bi-monthly card challenges for us...and even sends the winner (drawn out of a hat of course ;) ) a prize! How fabulous is she! Anyhow...here is my submission!

That's it for today...I'm tired now....played dodge ball and cooked the little people in the house dinner amongst all this play time...time for sleep!

Blog yeah later!